Am I a fast food chain terrorist?

When I first read this headline on the News section of the Reuters website: McDonald's December sales disappoint; shares fall; I was filled with a reasonable measure of excitement. Do not get me wrong, I am not a terrorist plotting to blow up strategically located outlets of McDonalds, KFC or any of the other fast-food, fast-fat, fast-death outlets. If you were to do some global stats on who the regular consumers of fast food are, I would not be anyway near the top of your stats list. You however will not find me languishing at the bottom either.

Why then was I excited with this seemingly negative titbit of news? The simple reason is that although I do partake now and again in these high-cholestrol, high-fat, high-sodium, low-nutrition, obesity-inducing "meals" now and again; I am a man on a mission to free myself of the urge to regularly nibble and swallow this vile poison. Like a smoker battling to free himself from the clutches of this addictive and falsely seductive and delicious taste, I constantly need the reassurance of knowing that out there, are many others also fighting for their health. There is strength in numbers and the less sales McDonalds and their cronies make; the more encouraged I become.

I particularly sympathise with children who will never live a normal, healthy life because they have become slaves of fast-food at an early age. Thanks to the glorification of fried chips, burgers and other gooey "delights" in the media, as well as the lack of concern from parents - children as young as three, are doomed to having limited mobility, heart disease, faulty breathing and a doggy bag full of other ailments. It was therefore disappointing to read further and learn that the cause of the low December sales was bad weather. Even then, I will not lose hope and can only keep my fingers crossed that this blog article will go viral on cyber space and cause the fast-food chain sales to plummet - for health reasons this time! Does that render me a terrorist?